I used to be super into religion because I loved the idea of mindlessly following a bunch of rules that don’t really mean anything to me and hoping that these arbitrary traditions will yield me an eternity of happiness.
Plus there’s the benefit of a superiority complex that comes with it, so that was pretty nice, feeling chosen and special and all that.
After a while though, it wasn’t really working for me anymore, maybe because I felt that talking and studying about having a great life instead of actually living it was kind of a drag. But also because religion always seemed so serious and hallowed, which seemed kind of silly.
Maybe if my house of worship injected a bit more humor into the whole glorification of God process, I’d be more keen to visit the mosque on a regular basis.
Like these churches who came up with brilliantly current and hilarious signs.
There were socio-political commentaries.
The sign in front of a Dallatown church reads, “Blessed are those from the $*!*holes Lk 17 11-19.”
“It wasn’t so much the President … but more specifically, the way the conversation was developing around it,” Pastor Christopher Rodkey.https://t.co/Q5ocitN7sR pic.twitter.com/l99wP0F1ii
— WITF news (@witfnews) January 20, 2018
And even favoritism for local football teams.
A sign outside the Assembly of God church in Brockton listed service information along with the message, “Pray for Tom’s Hand, Go Pats!” https://t.co/13BXtAmQ4x pic.twitter.com/7ycazWfADZ
— 7News Boston WHDH (@7News) January 21, 2018
See, but prayer for sports goes both ways. Guess it depends on whose congregation is bigger.
Church sign of the week: pic.twitter.com/SrRiNBCR8c
— Joshua Hershberger (@JosHershberger) January 18, 2018
Well, good news is in short supply these days.
A lot of them hit really close to home.
“Shock your mom. Come to mass.” -sign on a Portland church.
— Annie Zak (@annie_zak) January 19, 2018
I mean if there was a direct correlation between praying on weather and an improved climate, I’d be at church every single morning.
“remember last winter? repent or I’ll send more snow” –a church sign
— Malori (@muhloree) January 21, 2018
Let’s just hope there are some content filters.
Just saw a church in D.C. with a sign advertising free Wi-Fi. That’s either that most awesome or most pathetic thing I’ve seen.
— Dan Rafferty (@DanRafferty) January 20, 2018
The best church signs are the clever church signs.
Church sign in the country:
“Be an organ donor, give your heart to Jesus.”
— Michaella Petrassi (@under_thestars_) January 20, 2018
I mean, Luke does sacrifice himself. He didn’t pretend like it hurt, however, like the son of God did.
This church near my apartment often makes their sign say something silly. This time? “Jedi Jesus?” (Sorry for the blurry quality, the bus was moving) pic.twitter.com/ackX4i6MED
— Marysol (🌊&🌞) Velazquez (@marysolthewise) January 19, 2018
Oh snap! Good one, Padre.
“Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil, no point.”#churchsigns
— Irma🧜🏼♀️ (@tangled30) January 20, 2018
Unfortunately, most people don’t give us the comeuppances we deserve. I’m all for this one.
Today I passed a church sign that read “sin would be less attractive if the wages were paid immediately” and I’ve never seen a more true statement
— Jessica Prather (@heyitsjess15) January 19, 2018
Jesus: like hot soup for the soul.
Church sign: let the son warm your winter days
— Jessica Pruitt (@pruittyo) January 19, 2018
I wish the mosques I went to growing up were filled with jokes.
Turns out if I just broadened my worshiping horizons when I was younger, however, I would’ve discovered that church signs have been cracking jokes for a long time now.
All of this glory would’ve been mine.
I mean religious retail jokes? Come on!
Straight savage some of these signs are.
I mean that’s a pearl of wisdom right there.
All right so some of them indavertently make fun of themselves, but still.
Well, I mean, there’s a guarantee…